We got to the hospital at 12:30 and we said a prayer in the car for God's strength and guidance as he unveiled his most wonderful blessing he was about to reveal to us. We checked in and were taken upstairs to begin the process of induction. As we were about to enter the labor and delivery area of the 2nd floor, I was asked to stay outside for a few minutes while they processed Danielle into her room. If in 10 minutes I had not heard from them, pick up the phone and they will buzz me in the secured doors. Seems this is the time they ask the mother if the father beats her. Really. She is about to give birth and they want to know if the man is abusive. Don't get me wrong, I think it is great that a woman is given a chance to tell someone who can get her help that she is abused by her significant other, but how effective is the timing? She is about to do something that is extremely stressful and difficult, not to mention painful, and this is the time that they feel she would turn over on the one who is there for her to lean on and help guide them through the process? I suppose if even one woman gets the help she needs, it's worth it. I, of course, have nothing to worry about. Danielle is the one who beats me. Really. At every game we ever play.
Well, 10 minutes pass with no open doors. I pick up the phone to be told she's not ready yet. No chairs to sit in. Just stand in the hall with all the baggage like a puppy waiting to be let in. So I turn to my phone and browse Facebook looking to find someone to talk to. I found one person I could carry on a one way conversation with for the next 30 minutes. Thanks Jaime. Sorry Jaime.
Finally I gain entrance and meet Danielle in our induction room. For the actual delivery we will be in a much larger room. It is now pushing 1:30 am and we haven't even started. More questions about her health and current situation and its actually a little after 2:00 when the gel that will speed along her dilation is applied. She is at 2cm so the plan is 3 rounds of the gel, after each she will need to spend one hour resting, one hour walking. So the big show won't start for at least 6 hours. We really begin to see how long of a night it will be. After the first dose, the nurse is checking her vitals and hears something a little different about Danielle's heart beat and does a quick EKG which shows she seems to have an extra heartbeat every now and then, but not in any discernible pattern. She has had no other problems with her heart so this is news to us and could change the way her delivery progresses. A more detailed monitoring of her is ordered. After that is finally completed we only have about 30 minutes of walking time before the next dose. Danielle is not sad about this fact, getting around has begun to be quite laborious. No pun intended. Before the 2nd dose she is found to be at 3cm and will probably only need 1 more dose before moving to her delivery room for the big show.
We move into the room around 6:00 and she is at about 5cm so the last round is not necessary. We have to wait however, for the doctor to come on duty at 7:30 to start the medicine that will start the contractions and if the water is still intact he will break that as well. In the meantime, we ask how many people will be in the room for the delivery. 2 nurses, 1 doctor as long as everything goes as planned. We felt reassured that it will not be a circus while Danielle's in a rather exposed state. Plans change. Almost immediately we are asked if it would be OK if a student nurse shadowed our nurse to get experience. Danielle says that's fine. Another nurse comes in and decides it would be a great learning experience for the student to practice putting an IV in Danielle. I can almost hear D's mind screaming, "Why did I agree to this!". Unfortunately the nurses can not. She does really well, finds a good vein, hits it on the first stick, Michael breathes a sigh of relief. Danielle is just staring at the ceiling, which is very fortunate. The student pulls out the needle too early and blood starts shooting out all over her hand, falling to pool on the floor. It takes 2 bloody towels to clean the hand and a few on the floor to mop up the drippings, then a student nurse with a now shaky hand finally gets the procedure done. Not a great start, but hopefully the worst is over. Somehow I think I'm wrong.
The doctor is supposed to be in at 7:30 but we have begun to see a phenomenon known as 'doctor time', they always seem to run late. It is just as well as it allows for Mary Beth and Danielle's mom Paula, to get there before the fun starts. Doc finally gets in about 9:00am and it turns out that just as he got in he had to do another delivery before he could get to us. He starts the Petosin drip , which is the medicine to accelerate the contractions and speed up the labor process. It really starts to make a difference as we can see Danielle dealing with stronger contractions and at quicker intervals. She is doing well dealing with the pain but is starting to question whether or not she is up to dealing with the pain. About this time the anesthesiologist comes in to meet her and is told," Thanks,but I would like to stay away from you". She has made her mind up, we seem to have hit the point of no return. Soon the contractions really start to get hard and Danielle is starting to contemplate if she can do it. Finally she asks for something, anything, except the epidural. Because she rarely takes any pain medicine at home the nurse is reluctant to give her morethan her body can handle so she gives her the smallest measure of Stadol that she can, to see how she handles it. She is only at 5cm, so there will most likely be time before she reaches 7cm, the cut off time for IV drugs, to give her more. Immediately we see a difference as the peaks of the pain seem to get a little easier to deal with, but she is still in quite a lot of pain. At this point I am mainly her only hands on coach and its getting rough. To see her in this much pain is killing me.
After about an hour it is absolutely unbearable for her. Her face is showing some fear of what she is going through and she is second guessing her decision. She does not break her convictions though, no epidural. The nurse checks and we are at the 7cm mark now, no more IV meds. This is the big showdown, Danielle versus the unforgiving Labor Pains. I capitalize it because at this point it is a named entity. Godzilla would not be able to tail whip and stomp this monster. I believe that medivel torture might be a vacation compared to this foe.
I tell her that if she changes her mind about the epi she will really have to somehow convince me because at this point I am wholly committed to get her through this and any pleading is just the pain talking and not her lovely stubbornness cracking under the pressure. She says she just needs to know it will end. I assure her it will get there, that my favorite saying I learned from my mother, "This too shall pass", is true.
"No!", she says,"I need a time that it will end. Like tell me it will only be 20 more minutes!"
So began the longest 20 minutes of her life. It must have seemed like 3 hours to her. In fact it was the first time that the period of time between 11 am and 2 pm took place in 20 minutes. It seemed to work, she never challenged it and it gave her a goal. From this point on I really don't remember a whole lot of specifics. Mary Beth and Paula really came into the picture for us and coached both me and her through this. I know my experience was nothing compared to Danielle's but I had to get through a few mental blocks to get to the end. I cannot even begin to express how helpless and tortured I felt watching the absolute love of my life endure this. All I could do was talk and let her destroy my hand. Several times I started to breakdown and needed to know it was only 20 more minutes. I prayed to God for the strength for both of us to make it through because I was convinced at a couple of moments that we would not be able to do this. Without the support of MB and Mom, I would not have been able to make it and it was a Godsend they were there.
At his point it really got scary. Danielle had rolled over to her side, which meant the nurse always had to adjust the fetal monitor to pick up the heart beat. Only this time the nurse was not in the room and instead of 'losing' the heartbeat on the monitor, this time it seemed to be picking up the slowing heartbeat of the baby. I was listening horrified, trying to figure out if the slowing would stop. After what seemed like forever, the nurse rushed in to check it out and in a very controlled concerned manner tried to get the heartbeat to pick up. She tried to call for assistance but due to remodeling near the nurses station the others could not hear her. Finally another nurse walked in and you could tell this was not the one she was hoping for. She sent her off and next thing we know there is a big parade of help as they start to get her into a position to allow the bab to get circulation and get the room ready for the actual delivery. At this point Danielle made the very clear announcement to the nurse,"My hoo-hoo hurts!". The nurse was very confused so it was explained that due to the amount of 3 year olds she watches at home, this was her way of saying the baby was moving down for towards the exit. Very quickly everything came back under control and progressed in a quick and safe manner. Thank God the nurses had cool heads under pressure.
This was it, she was at 10cm and it was time to get the doctor. He was in the OR delivering another baby. The nurses set us up in case one of them had to catch. I knew I should have brought my baseball mitt. I thought it would really suck if after all this our doctor was not able to make it for the very end. Fortunately he made it in and we began the pushing.
This was really the only time Danielle let herself make the sounds we had heard earlier in the week, as the pain seemed to increase tenfold. Ten times tenfold. It was made very apparent after each progressive contraction that "IT HURTS!!". The neighbors were now aware it was not a cake walk. I was so amazed she had made it this far, and I knew she could do the rest, but it was going to be unbearable. She really only had about 45 minutes of hard labor and 5 rounds of hard pushing to get to the end, and from what we had heard from other womens birth stories, this was quick for the first baby.
Just then the nurses station buzzed in. "Mrs. Kenan?", the speaker asked. "Whhaaatt?", Danielle managed to answer. "Can Dan come in?", it was Danielle's father. "No!", she replied without any hesitation. Sorry Dan, not the right time, but soon! We all remarked that maybe this was a sign of the sex since it would have been Daniel if it was a boy. We, as well as he, would have to wait.
Seeing the baby crowning was one of the most amazing sights I have ever seen. With each push a little more was being unveiled. The amount of hair on the head was so thick and dark, I told Danielle that the baby got her gorgeous hair. Danielle wanted to "get it out already!" and wasn't sure if she could do it. She really had to reach down deep for each push, only able to get about two good ones with each contraction. As the head reached it's outermost point, she seemed about to take a break but I truly believe that God gave her the energy and determination to do one last push.
With that last effort our lives changed forever. The baby came out in one motion, head to feet and our mystery was unveiled. It was a girl, Laura Anne. I have never felt such amazing love in my heart. Of course I cried, how could I not. She is the most beautiful sight I have ever seen. A head full of glorious hair, 10 fingers, 10 toes, and the greatest crying voice I have ever heard. Perfect in every way. We were now a full family. Seeing Danielle hold her in her arms, looking at her with absolute awe and true love, made my heart melt, my mind explode, and my soul sing out in praise of Our Father's amazing blessings!
Never would I trade these moments for anything in the world. I truly have so much respect and admire my wife for what she did, her resolve to conquer her biggest challenge carried her through. I love her truly madly.
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